Monday, July 15, 2013

Speak Lord: A Listening Lesson

Sometimes it takes a hit to the head to truly take a good look at what's going on in your life- literally.  I was a freshman in college, at an indoor track meet carrying my starting blocks toward the starting line when I was plowed over by another sprinter.  It knocked me out-concussion, bruises all over from such force and from the huge metal blocks landing on top of me, and a tooth they said I'd have to get pulled. I was told I was walking the wrong way around the track; that I wasn't paying attention, but I SWORE I was.  But you know what, I was walking the wrong way and I wasn't paying attention. . . to my life; to what God was calling me to do.  

Fast forward 12.5 years.  Loud crash.  Crying.  Search one room.  No kid.  Panic. Search second room.  Bench on top of daughter; lift it off her and ask if she's ok.  "Yes."  Lift her up. Blood. . .  and lots of it.  Things get a little crazy and time seems to stand still, but after a trip to the ER and 4 staples to the back of the head later, Joanna is her busy, boisterous self.  

That night, I tried putting all the events in order.  I can't remember exactly what I was doing at that moment, but I had planned to start cleaning my house that day for an upcoming party I'm hosting.  In the midst of me thinking if only I'd have. . . or thank goodness this. . . ., Psalm 46:10 kept coming to me. God was telling me over and over  "be still; be still; be still."  Be still and know that I am God."  

In the months leading up to the birth of Tessa as well as in labor, two bible verses soothed my soul: Jeremiah 29:11 and this one.  I found great comfort in contemplating God's words as well as listening to one of my very favorite songs: Be Still My Soul sung by Katie Gustafson.  Listen to the song here.  (My kids like to play it over and over for me-it's catching!)  

I'm sure I'm not alone when I say I need reminders to keep on the right track or to find meaning in everyday life.  God is always speaking to us these same words He spoke to David long ago: "be still." Unfortunately for my daughter it again took a knock to the head for me to listen.  It seems our lives are anything but still.  When I'm busy, distracted, or overcommitted, I might miss God.  When I'm under pressure, anxious, or in a hurry I might not hear Him talking to me. 

Now I'm not saying this axcdent (as Joanna would say) wouldn't have happened if my long list of "things to do" wasn't on my mind, but it made me slow down and put things in perspective.  For God says in Matthew 6:34 "do not worry about tomorrow: tomorrow will take care of itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own." Or like St. Martha whom the Lord tells, "you are anxious about many things, but only one thing is necessary.  Mary has chosen the better part." Jesus wasn't telling her not to serve Him, but that at that moment he was calling her to be with Him-worship and adore Him.  

                                         [painting of Saint Martha]
                                                                 http://www.saintmarthachurch.org/saint_martha_biography.htm

The Martha and Mary story reminds me of the Benedictine motto: ora et labora  (pray and work).  This balanced way of living that St. Benedict, (whose feast we celebrated July 11th,) lived and taught isn't an obsolete practice, but something so needed in the modern world.  By giving God prayer time, He leads us into a deeper union with Him.  Fruits of prayer are peace and the capability to do His will for Him.  By putting God first, all else will be ordered in our lives: our work, play, relationships, etc.  In a disordered lifestyle where God is second, last, occasional, or not there at all, our lives are basically a downward spiral of overwhelming disasters.  As Celeste at Sacred Sharings for the Soul puts it, we create a god out of work and the fruits of this "devotion" are not able to sustain us or satisfy our needs. The often ignorant idea of what obedience to God entails or may ask of our lives can keep us prisoner to the world and unable to attain what we are truly striving for. It keeps us slaves to something that does not provide for what we truly need.     

                                          
                               http://hilltopshepherd.wordpress.com/2011/07/11/st-benedict-work-study-and-prayer-at-the-house/

 Sometimes (for me as a mom) it's easy to know the next task at hand: e.g. a crying, hungry baby, a dirty diaper, or the beans boiling over on the stove.  But at other times seeking God in our actions (simply the next task at hand or a major life decision) may seem blurry.  It takes discernment; prayerful discernment.  If we seek God in our work or ask God what He is calling us to do next, our work can become a form of prayer.  By embracing the Rule of St. Benedict, we can live a harmonious life of prayer and work so, as again Celeste writes, " that we are not slaves to our tasks, or victims of empty and burdensome rushed prayers."  

The Martha and Mary story also reminds me that I am most definitely a Martha!  I dislike last minute plans (in fact, at times, I loathe them!).  I am a planner, and although I know things rarely go as planned, I still like a schedule and a heads up of things that will be happening.  I've got a list-if not on paper, for sure in my head and usually both!  I'm also a perfectionist.  I've got it all fashioned how it "should" be and when its not I'm bound to be disappointed or in need of taking it all in.  It's hard for me to 'let go' and surrender.  Like Martha, I am anxious about many things, but even anxiousness and worries can be given to the Lord.  The rewards of putting our complete trust in Him are far greater than we can ever imagine!  I seek, (although not often enough) St. Martha's intercession to be still and to desire to do a wife's/mother's work with a joyful heart.  All things happen for a reason and God is shaping my heart by the circumstances in my life.  In prayer and work, I can experience peace and joy despite upset plans, deadlines, disappointments and the unexpected turn of events. 
   
And so to my guests for this Sunday:
*My floors may not be clean, but I did play catch in the rain with my husband and kids.
*I may not have dusted, but I was busy watching homemade confetti fireworks.  
*I may not have the laundry folded and put away, but we've been trying to "teach" the baby to crawl. 

Let us strive to be like Samuel who says, "Speak Lord, your servant is listening" (Samuel 3:10)  For knowing and doing God's will gains us a spirit of peace and joy beyond our wildest dreams.  It gives the hardest or most mundane tasks purpose.  And our actions become prayers themselves.  It's amazing that when we give all to God, He gives us much, much more!  If we fail to listen to God, we might just miss some of life's greatest moments.  I'm glad I didn't miss. . . 

celebrating Joanna's Baptism anniversary  (July 11),


making castles,

and making bubble mustaches.

What is God saying to you?



http://sacredsharingsforthesoul.blogspot.com/2013/07/the-balance-of-st-benedictora-et-labora.html